"That which we refuse to thank Christ for - we refuse to believe Christ can redeem" - Ann Voskamp - One Thousand Gifts
This was a hard one to swallow. It meant that God wanted me to thank him for even the bad things when they, in my mind, seem far from redemption.
Five months ago, my husband and I came under immense judgment for a decision we made in obedience to God. Relationships that we thought could be trusted were severed in one devastating instant. As we embarked on a new and exciting journey, we also moved forward, aching and reeling and trying to make sense of what was lost.
During this time, I fought and hated and cried and stung and questioned.
And one day, I decided to gather some of those heart-words from Ann Voskamp and paste them up on my kitchen walls and cupboards - along with the carved lettering my mother sent me for my birthday: Grace; Eucharisteo; Thanksgiving; Joy.
So I could be reminded, and so those words would sink in and somehow become a reality in the desert that I was in.
"That which we refuse to thank Christ for - we refuse to believe Christ can redeem" - these words hang strategically right above the sink.
Many days, I did the dishes and read these words and wondered at them, that "God works all things for the good of those who love him and are called according to his purpose." This was not my reality.
Probably, just short of two weeks ago, I decided to take that risk and thank God for the ugly - for the way we were prejudged and written off, for painful, heartbreaking, condemning words from one whom we trusted.
I had forgiven by this time, but had never thanked God for what happened.
And so, that morning, hands deep in soapy water, I thanked him for the devastating and acknowledged his power to redeem anything and everything no matter how bad it is.
Today, I am overwhelmed by reconciliation, a softening of hearts, by an embrace in arms that once pointed fingers, genuine, loving words from a mouth that once held piercing arrows, by a welcome instead of a judgment.
I am overwhelmed by redemption.
I will keep thanking for everything and in everything.
But today, I thank God...
for the ugly-beautiful - that which he has redeemed and is redeeming.
